Monday, February 27, 2012

Time flies...

when you're picking up the pieces. It will be 6 months in just 2 weeks. Six entire months, half of a year, 182 days and countless hours. It blows my mind that I have lived the last 6 months without him, the dogs, his family.

I feel like I'm in the twilight zone - it's bizarre. It has left me bereft of  the little happiness I had gained. I recently read somewhere that one must work to keep their happiness. I don't pretend to be doing a great job, but I do try.

Realizing how much time has passed has only exacerbated my loneliness and has created a vacuum of missing. At least I know that I am not alone on this journey. Walking around with a phantom limb can become cumbersome.

The unknown is what pains my heart. You spend 3 years of your life with one person each moment blending into another moment of oneness - until words no longer need to be spoken. Until you know what he is thinking with just a glance at his face. Until your yous and mes become us and we.

Now, you can't remember the sound of his voice, his smile, the sound of his laugh.

-sigh-

May cannot get here any quicker.

Tip: Patience.

namaste.

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