Tomorrow is the big day! I am beyond excited right now. I need these two days to fly, so I can be sitting getting my tattoo already. It has been extremely difficult to not post the design here or on Facebook, because I don't want to hear opinions. I also want the element of surprise on my side, because of the nature of the tattoo.
So I am writing my 102nd post - how cool is that? I cannot believe I have written 100+ posts - - it felt like it was just yesterday that I started writing again. I feel elated to have accomplished so much, especially since I was never a fan of letting people read my work. It also marks the days since the break up - how glad am I? Super!
It is actually comforting to me that I have made it past 100 + days intact. Yes, there have been more than enough bumps along my way, but I've managed to get up and dust myself off every single time. This is a testament to my strength and courage - 2 things I believed I sorely lacked. He told me on the 2nd day after our break up that I would be okay, because I was strong. I was of the strongest people he has ever met. I didn't believe him then - or 3 months later. At the moment I was dying inside (pretty much self-imploding) and the hurt was unbearable. So, I scoffed at the notion that I was strong.
Pfft. He was right, my family and friends were right.
It happens that he was right with a few things.
The Heartbreak Bible has proven to be quite a useful tool on my journey. I understand that some women aren't into the whole self help thing. My roommate for example, kinda just chuckled and shook her head when I should her the book. I for one, am open to try all sorts of different things. It's in my personality - I'm a dabbler. I'm also a believer that there are certain situations that require additional help outside of yourself.
It helps you to delve and dig deeper than you are probably willing to dig. I'm doing all the exercises which sometimes proves to be emotionally exhausting. Overall, I think it has contributed to this new phase/feeling that I seem to be entering. I won't dare say that I'm completely healed, but I'm starting to feel the first rays of hope. Let me tell you kiddies, it feels wonderful. I'm finally beginning to untangle myself and move more freely.
Tip: If you are still struggling with the hurt - try finding outside help. Positive help!! It doesn't have to be a self help book. It can be a friend, volunteering, therapy, writing - anything that you can draw strength from.
namaste.
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