Day 5 - Going Strong

I feel like I'm a recovering addict. I need countdowns though, they're encouraging.

One month of Crossfit and I'm hooked. People get rebounds to get over relationship and I do Crossfit. Crossfit is my rebound. The rush of endorphins, its like a high and I don't want it to stop. It's a bonus that I am getting into shape.

One month since my relationship ended. In that one month I underwent many changes, positive ones. I also felt the most hurt and lost in many years.

3 days ago, it finally happened. Everything fell into place and I was finally ready. I made the decision to finally put myself first. Life was going forward without me and I could not continue down that path. I severed our last connection and it felt incredibly right. I realized that I have a choice in this situation. I do have a say in my outcome.

My decision: to REALLY let go. This is the first time in the last 3 years and I admit, I'm a little scared. Out of sight, out of mind has become my motto. There's too much to look forward to and I refuse to spend one more moment crying.

2 weeks till my favorite holiday: Halloween. I will buy my pumpkin as I always do. I will decorate my home. Will it all be bittersweet? Of course, but I will push through it. If Crossfit has taught me anything, it's that I AM strong. Every workout that I survive, is another moment that I know I will survive.

The love will be there, but it will no longer dictate my emotions. Like everything else in  life, that too will eventually fade into wonderful memories. Memories that I will cherish my whole life time, but for now, I am cherishing the present moment.

Sometimes things happen that force a life altering change and it's sink or swim. I have decided that I am done sinking and I'm slowly making my way to the surface.

Onwards! Forward!